Friday, December 30, 2016

Happy Socks

Most of you have probably noticed that I have been swapping out my black Brooks Brothers socks with exciting colorful hosiery from Happy Socks.  If you ride the 6:14am train, you DEFINITELY have seen my socks. That's because I sit in the top row and hike my slacks up at least 3 inches. Here's what my new socks are saying, in case it's not obvious. 

Pink Polka Dot
There is literally nothing that can stop me. I am an absolute animal and will dismember you and beat you with your own appendages.  You think Carl from accounting is crazy with those sideburns? Fuck that. I have pink polka dot socks, bitch. 

Red Wave
I surf and skate and generally rip. I BMX and pull tubes and smoke meth and punch kooks trying to take my wave. I am a local. I am THE local. The little groms look up to me but I scare them because of my Red Wave socks from Happy Socks. 

I spent most of my life tripping on acid, or so it seems to the other riders on the 6:14am train.  I have several CDs from the band Phish and play them when the kids are asleep. The wife hates Phish and my Balloon socks from Happy Socks and I don't give a good goddamn. 

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